To be truely alone (open

[Syron Black Cross]

Its often said that we are never alone. As human beings we can always rely on god, or those around us for comfort...
Syron read from a pamphlet he got from a young nurse. She was barely older then him, yet he felt the same about her as he did everyone else. He felt the same malice towards her as he did the rest of the world.

He was setting in a small room pure white. Nothing was in it other then a bed. He used the north wings bathroom so his room was much nicer then a cell.

Syron lay back into his bed, He was hoping he would get some company.. Some one else to talk to. Though he hated everyone he still believed himself to be sane. He believed that he could get through this just like anything else. He could get through this just like the murders he had to witness, just like the things he had to do to survive this was one of them. To fight and die was nothing compared to being imprisoned though. It almost made him think about killing himself.

Syron continued to read the pamphlet.

... Yet with those whom are clinically depressed its often said they do not rely on any humans nor do they care whether or not their is a god. If such a person is reading this then that person should ask himself. What is good in my life? Well reader you are lucky compared to some.

Syron read and threw the magazine down into the floor.

"Its not as if I feel sorry for myself."
He said out loud to himself. He looked straight up at the ceiling. Their was a black dot he created using a marker he stole from the recreational office. The fact of the matter was he hated being alone because he never rested. Their is no rest for the wicked his mother used to say. He turned over on his side. If anyone came in he would set up and still act nonchalant but it actually meant something to him that a few people knew he existed. It helped him to hear other peoples voices and feel their emotion.

[Cara Jaala]

Dr. Jaala looked down at the folder in her hand. The patient she was supposed to see was #10632. Aka Syron Black Cross. He was one of the ones in the North Wing closer to her heart. She didn't feel pity for her patients. She just wished life, God, or whatever had been kinder to them than it had. Syron had clinical depression and anger problems. Being in a locked down area like the North Wing probably didn't help. Cara belived that if he was let out to walk at times he'd calm down. But so far she hadn't been granted that freedom for him.

She knocked on the door to his room and waited for an answer. The guard who watched over the area gave her a nod and she nodded back. "I'll be fine with him. Why don't you go take a break?" Syron knew her and didn't really attack her. She was there to talk to him and help him. His past was one of the sadder ones so far. And she knew she didn't even know all of it yet. The guard gave her a smile of thanks and left.

Cara would be perfectly fine. She wasn't a normal doctor. Well she had the degree and everything but she didn't look like a psychiatrist should. Thats why she looked the way she did. She didn't want to be a steryotype and so ended up looked way younger than she actually was. At 26 she really looked about 21 and such. Pink, blonde, and black hair, piercings, and tattoos. She didn't even dress like a doctor. More often than not she wore jeans or shorts or something of the like. It worked for her.

Cara called out through the door, in case Syron didn't know who it was, "Syron it's me. Cara. I just came to talk. That cool with you?" He didn't really like people obviously. But as far as she could tell he didn't really seem to mind her. Cara knew about the nurses trying to be nice to him but they really didn't know what to do. Their answer to everything, at least for the younger nurses, was 'Why can't they just control themselves?' or to give them some pills. Frankly that pissed Cara off. She didn't normally deal with the nurses directly and had some of her people deal with them instead.

[Syron Black Cross]

Syron heard Cara knock. Well company had arrived. Despite the fact she was a doctor she seemed to understand him the most. The rest of the world however did not. He was often calmer around females. Males often misunderstood him and challenged him. That pissed him off, then someone had to be hurt or killed.
"Yea its fine. Come in"
He said coldly.

He ran his hand through his hair and set up. He leaned back against the wall, His eyes were bloodshot from the medication he received earlier. Cara always did interest him. She didn't use the guards like others, nor did they usually accompany her. Not to mention she also didn't try to beat the insane out of him. That seemed to be a common approach these days.

Syron brought his knees forward towards his chest. He wore a black muscle shirt now and jeans with cuts in the knees. At first glance, He could have been thought of as a punk rock musician rather then a cold hearted gangster.

His emotionless eyes looked around the room noting the only piece of furniture he had rather then the bed... was the magazine he through in the floor. His cold eyes peered back to the door and he waited for her to come in. His gloves covered his bloody hands. It was a wound he didn't show anyone, He received it from beating a guard in the chest the guards held him down and Tasered his fists after subduing him. Taser marks still covered his chest, and arms. Though his chest was hidden by his shirt his arms were quite visible and slightly muscular. He hated not being able to work out. But the fighting certainly kept him in shape. When he could he would often do push ups or set ups or run in place. After all on the streets if he was off guard or soft for one moment... It would be his last.

[Cara Jaala]

Cara heard his acceptance and opened the door with a smile. The first thing she noticed was him on the bed. His knees were up against his chest like normal. He was dressed like a rocker punk today, it seemed. But whatever. He could wear what he wanted to as far as she cared. The second thing she noticed was the magazine on the floor. She only noticed it because she'd stepped on it. Picking it up she raised an eyebrow at it. She skimmed over some of what it said and snorted. Then she tossed it over her shoulder into the trash. "Well that must have been a waste of reading. Did one of the nurses give it to you?"

She sat on the floor in front of him, tugging down the edge of her tank top that had ridden up slightly. Her jean clad legs crossed as she looked up at him. Cara opened the file in front of her and read over the new information. It said he'd gotten into another fight with the guards and she sighed. From the sound of things he'd really been hurt. Oh the file didn't exactly say that. But she knew it had to be true. The guards were muscle headed jkerks who used too much force and not enough thought. She closed it with a disgusted sound. "Alright. You want to show me where they hurt you? Because I highly doubt anyone cared enough to check to see how bad the marks were."

She waited for his answer. It was up to him if he wanted her help. Cara's job might be to get him to spill his guts but she wasn't going to make him. That would be stupid. She trusted her patients to tell her the truth and about themselves and they, usually, in turn trusted her. Cara noticed his bloodshot eyes and mentally cursed. The nurses had given him some meds that would probably affect his thoughts. Damn. Was it any wonder why she hated them?

She tucked some of her pink hair behind her ear and idly played with her two lip piercings. She leaned back on her hands to look up at him on the bed easier. She really hated that they didn't give them more furneture because it was uncomfortable to sit on the floor after a point. But she wasn't going to complain. "Oh that reminds me. They're still denying my request to allow you outside to go on walks. I'm sorry Syron. I'll keep trying..... but I doubt they'll ever say yes considering the guards and you keep getting into fights."

[Syron Black Cross]

"Hurt me?These scratches aren't what I would consider being hurt. Cara I never asked you before but why is it you care so much? You don't know what kind of person I am, If you can consider me a person that is."
syron replied coldly. He ripped his shirt off showing the tazer wounds, A knife slash or two was also on his chest old scars for the proud demon, His gang tattoos covered his torso and left arm.

"This place cant hold me for long... No need to ask for more freedom for a guy like me, After I escape this place...I..."
He stopped rembering that trusting people was a complete waste of time. Even though he related best with Cara he didn't want anyone to care about him, nor did he want to care about them. He was a murderer.

"I'm not the type that needs friends... To rely on another for comfort, or power... Is weakness."
He replied looking in her eyes. He then looked at the floor she was setting on. He got off the bed and walked over to the wall. He heard a pound on it from another room. He took his gloved wounded fist and hit the wall returning the pounding from the next room. The person in the other room continued pounding.. Moris code...

Syron hit the wall 6 times. Saying in moris code.
*Shut up or ill kill you*

The response was nothing. It showed how respected he was. He turned back to Cara He set in the floor.

"So why exactly did you come Cara?"
He said nonchalantly. He stretched his arms upwards, blood ran from his gloved hands down his arms. Quite a bit of blood at that. However he was not phased by the pain. He was use to torture... His life was torture.

[Cara Jaala]

Cara raised an eyebrow again and shrugged. She was used to her patients asking her that. "They might not be to you, but to me they are. As for why I care, I just do. I know what it's like to be alone and unloved. Having to take care of yourself or die. I might not have been in a gang and such but I know somewhat what your life might have been like. I'm not saying I understand all of it. I doubt anyone but you could. But I understand a little bit. And I do what I do because I want to make sure the people who have been worse off than me, know they aren't alone and are cared for. It might not be a smart answer but it's mine."

She sighed when she noticed the new marks on his body and wished she could kick those guards butts. She knew they were in the hospital but damnit. They shouldn't have hurt him. he was only 17 for god's sake. If there was even a god. Cara was athiest.

"I know it can't hold you. I never expected it could for long. But until you leave I want to help you any way I can. You might have seen things no one should see, but in reality you're still a teenager Syron. And think that having friends is a weakness all you want. Thats not true and if you thought about it, you'd see that. Mothers have been known to have incredible strength when their child was in danger. Love doesn't make one weak. In actuality, it makes them stronger because it means they will do anything in their power to protect the one they loved." Cara shrugged. He didn't have to believe her. but that's what she thought.

She watched him walk over to the wall and beat it a few times. She knew the patients were able to communicate through moris code. What they were saying was not something she knew. Or cared to learn. So Cara had no idea what he said to the other person to make the beating stop. Then he moved back toward her and sat down.

She sighed. "Besides that it's my job to talk to you? Which is stupid anyway I'd like to point out. I figured you might want someone to talk to. About anything. I know you don't like silence. Not to mention I wanted to check up on you. I'd heard about the guards. If I was allowed to I'd bring you a punching bag in here so you could use that instead of a guard's face." She smiled, really only joking then. About the guards anyway. She'd been serious about the punching bag.

That's when she noticed the blood and her eyebrows snapped together in a frown. Cara grabbed one of his arms and set it in her lap while pulling the glove off of his hand. At the site of more blood, a breath hissed out. "Those f*cking pricks. They did this to you? They should be in jail!" It wasn't often that she cursed outloud. Mentally, yes. Out where people could hear her? Very rarely. But she was pissed off now. "Syron why didn't you say anything?!" Both hands were bloody, she could tell.

[Syron Black Cross]

"Its fine...Don't tell anyone. I don't need my rep hurt worse then it already has been. Its bad enough people consider me a lunatic right? Its like I said Cara... Sooner or later... Ill be leaving this place, And Ill be the leader of my old gang, after killing the guy who took my spot."
He replied coldly he moved away.
He rarely talked this much. It must have been the drugs they gave him he thought to himself. He was after all a bit tipsy and everything was more blurry then usual. They must have gave him a larger dosage.

Syron heard a bang on his wall... The moris code read

Savior, is it safe to talk to you.

Syron walked over to the wall and used his bloody fist to hit it hard, showing his power to those who follow him.

Not tonight, We're going to be careful tell the men to stay calm and out of trouble for a bit.

Syron walked back over to cara.
"Forgive the intrusion... Its as I said dont worry about this, Its a mere scratch."
Despite him being a street kid his manners were very good considering he was high up in the gang, and was always treated with class when talking to the mafia and yakuza. He learned fast how to talk to people correctly.

Blood poured down his hands and he slipped his glove back on. The black gloves were not loaded at the time with their razors. He hadnt planed on fighting... Anytime soon.

Another bang happened on his wall.
Guards are listening to you.

The guy said in morris code. Then syron heard a scream the guards must have came in on the guy.

"Oh well... Cara it seems were not alone."
Syron replied darkly. His dark blue eyes seemed to peirce his company. He had the abilty to make people feel nervous around him, despite his size people 3 times bigger then him would rarely want to fight him. His stone cold murder eyes, Usually caused people to think twice before messing with him. Only did people fight him, if they had help.

Syron set down on his bed and scooted back against the wall. He reached under his bed and pulled out cigarates.

"Care for one?"

[Cara Jaala]

"Fine. I won't tell anyone. But if you aren't starting to heal in the next couple days I will do something about it. Even if I have to sedate you I will. Got it Syron?" She nodded her head. Cara had already figured that he was going to get out of here. She even told him she did. But she wouldn't help him. Yeah she cared about him but if she helped him he'd be pissed at her AND she'd loose her job. That wasn't an option.

She heard the moris code start up again and ignored it. Like she even knew what it meant. Hell he could be telling someone how to kill her. She doubted that but it could really be anything they were talking about. "I know you're going to rejoin the gang. I might not like it for your sake but I can't stop you. I won't even try. I just hope you'll be a little bit more careful next time. Next time you're caught you won't have this place or juvie as an option. You'll be tried as an adult and will go to prison. You understand that right?"

Cara heard a scream and stood up with a flash. She frowned, knowing it had to be the guards again. Sometimes she really hated those guys. She pushed open the door to the room and yelled at the guards. "You have been told before. You are not to do any unnessesary harm to the patients. I WILL have you fired if you disobey my orders again." She glared at them, her eyes having turned a sharp blue in her anger. The guards stuttered an apology at being faced with their boss and started to treat the patient better. She stood in the door until they were finished and then went back in, closing it behind her.

Syron's cold look meant nothing to her. He wasn't the first in this place to have eyes like that. And if she had to, she could protect herself. Cara didn't think she would have to against him. But still. She raised an eyebrow when she noticed the cigarretes. For a second she wondered about how he'd gotten them in here but then forgot about it. She didn't care. "No thanks. I had the taste and the smell." She eased back down onto the floor in front of him.

[Syron Black Cross]

"Oh well, too bad..."
Syron said and put them away not taking one himself. He laid down in the bed and looked straight up towards the ceiling.

"I don't plan to join it... I plan to capture it, Those with weak minds are easy to destroy. You know, just once when I was out there I wished someone would give a fuck, But no one ever did. Even now in this place no one cares. Its places like this that shelter monsters like me and the others... That should be destroyed. I would have chosen prison if it was up to me, The lawyer the state appointed put me in here. Freedom from this place means to fight my way out. Those who stop me have to die..."

Syron said coldly He continued looking at the ceiling his facial expression was blank.

"I hope your not with them, I hope your not against me... Its not that we are friends its just your a good enough liar to make me believe you actually care... Its simply your job though."

Syron said coldly as he lay in the uncomfortable bed surrounded by a white layout... How he stood out in contrast to the white... He smiled and set up.

"Even If you don't care..."
He cut his sentence off and laughed.

"No I shouldn't say that, I'm not interested in making friends... I'm interested in gaining power. Cara Don't fight against me should I ever try to escape... It would complicate things. You really shouldn't worry about me though, Next time i wont be caught, Next time ill fight til the death. No more captivity. Beasts aren't meant to be caged you know."

He had held that in his mind for quite some time. His blue eyes stared straight at the ceiling, the black dot he painted their was the only thing that set his room apart from the hundreds of other rooms. He wanted to destroy this place... After he gained power he would try to.

[Cara Jaala]

She raised an eyebrow and let him ramble on. He was wrong about no one caring. She did. But he had obviously bypassed that. "Places like this actually help people. Maybe not everyone or in the way some need to be helped. But for some it does. It shouldn't be distroyed."

Cara watched him lay back and look up at the ceiling. At his words she snorted. "I don't lie. And I'm not on anyone's side. Syron you've known me since you got here. When have I ever lied to you? I have no reason to lie. I hate liers anyway. Thats why I tell people, straight up, what I think and feel. In all reality I'm not supposed to care about my patients or become attached to them. But I do. So I'm not just 'doing my job.'"She rolled her eyes at him, even though he couldn't really see.

"I don't care if all you want is power. It gets lonely up at the top without friends. not to mention you can't terrorize everyone into working for you. Sooner or later they will end up revolting. And I wasn't planning on fighting against you. 'People' shouldn't be locked up in cages except for the ones in jail." She put the emphasis on people so he'd know that she didn't think of him as a beast. "Why fight to the death? You say you want power. How much power do you think you can get on the streets? Or even if your dead. As soon as you die all of your power will go to someone else. I know you understand that. You're not a stupid kid. In fact you're one of the smarter ones I know."

She sighed and just sat there, waiting for him to either look at her again, or talk, or something. It was kind of weird talking to a bed, not even sure if the person on it is even listening anymore.

[Syron Black Cross]

"Have you ever killed cara? Theirs a saying in the bible, Those who live by the sword die by the sword you know... I believe its true... I killed so I'm destined to be murdered. The thrill of battle is one of my only reasons for living. Why have a friend? Someone to betray me, Even if they didnt betray me... what If I Let them die? Like I did my little sister? I cant live with that ever again."

Syrons voice was weaker then normal, Yet he was not in tears or half as emotional as most people were. His voice was still uncaring, He sounded as if he didnt care yet he did... It was one of the only things he promised himself not to let happen again. He wouldn't make a friend so he wouldn't lose one. A intelligent plan.

Syrons hair was pressed flat against the wall, and the room was starting to get hot, He hated the air of the room.. It was "Used air. He called it used because it was not fresh air one would breath outside. It was the dank air of a sealed tight place with crappy ventallation because they are afraid of crazies going through the vents and ruining the place or escaping.

"This place has not helped me in the least... This place is no more then a prison, for the insane. For being different they place us in this prison..."
He said coldly, still staring at the black dot in the middle of the room. His arm fell off the bed, The bed of his was now covered in his own blood, The other side of the mattress was very bloody he had simply turned it so it would look more appealing. The guards rarely made his bed... once a month maby.

[Cara Jaala]

Cara sighed at his question. "Actually.... I have. And I know of that saying. But one can always put the sword down." She looked at him again. She wasn't proud of her past but it was true. She'd once killed someone. "Ok. I guess I can see your point. But as I've said, they don't have to betray you or die. It's like karma. If you believe it, it will happen." She knew that his sister had been killed. He'd told her once, a while back.

Cara wished that she could help him. He wasn't even 18 and he'd already seen things no person should see in their whole life. She stood up and sat down on the edge of the bed beside him. Not on top of the blood though. She mentally frowned and made a reminder to get guards in here to change the bed out. She felt herself getting hot and sweat gather on her skin. Damn ventallation. Ugh.

"I know. But it's a place where people can get the help they wouldn't be able to get otherwise. To some this is the only home they'd ever known. To others, like you, they only think of this place as a jail. And not just this place. It's the same anywhere. Even the streets. It all depends on the person and their feelings. No one is exactly the same as another. That's impossible. Even twins aren't exactly the same in everyway." She brushed a sisterly hand over his head and wished she could do more to help him. She took her hand back and just sat there. "I know you don't believe me. Or just don't want to. But I do care about you. And not just because your a patient, alright?" Cara looked away from him and toward the ceiling, noticing the black dot.

[Syron Black Cross]

Syron pulled away from her, His cold eyes seemed sadder then normal The eyes is the window to the soul, Syron looked at her, Trying to be cold.

"You shouldn't try to be my friend Cara... It'll only get you killed. This air... This Room, This whole fucking institution... Is a prison... Its where people rot, They spend their whole lives wanting freedom... But that dream is never a reality. Most people don't know how well they got it, Why do I gotta be in a place like this Cara?"

Syron said coldly...

"Theres nothing wrong with any of us, And I'de rather call hell home then this place, at least their people are honest about where they are and where you are! It doesn't matter if you insane the fire takes us all anyway."

Syron said his emotions rising more then before. He pulled himself back against the wall and wrapped his arms against his legs enclosing them, Like he used to when he was little. He looked to her and then let go of his legs and put the tips of his fingers and the tips of his index fingers together, forming a diamond. It was a sign he used to calm down, He always did it for good luck and calamity. It was in a way a token of luck, few lived to tell about seeing Syron's sign. Due to the fact every guy syron ever fought saw that sign, and not one of them lived.

[Cara Jaala]

Cara snorted at his words and looked up at the ceiling again. "Syron if it was easy for me to be killed, I would have been dead long long ago. As I said I have killed before. Out of protection of myself. And, sorry, but it had been against someone a lot worse than you. That's why your cold looks don't bother me. You know I'm not putting you down, or challenging you. It's just the truth. You don't know anything about my past. No one does." She turned her head to look at him with a fake smile.

"As I said. You're my friend, whether you want to believe that or not. So deal with it. And I know this place is a prison. But at least it's not one of the ones where everyone is hurt in some way. Only a few. And whoever hurts someone else I usually have fired or sent away. I won't put up with things like that. You are still hear because I know you rarely start the fights you get into. Frankly the guards you hurt deserve it. And there is such thing as freedom. It just depends on what your definition of it is."

"Syron you don't deserve this. And I wish you weren't here having to deal with it. But you'll be out of here sooner or later." Cara shrugged. "Sweetheart, life is hell. You of all people should understand that. There is no God and there is nothing after this existance. You can believe whatever you want, like rebirth, but to me death is death. That's it. That's why I live my life to the fullest I can."

Cara noticed him move back. And the hand sign he made. She understood what it meant and sighed. She turned until she was facing him on the bed. She didn't reach out to him though. That would be stupid. He was trying to calm down. She didn't want him blowing up. She didn't even say anything more, waiting for a sign from him that he was ok.

[Syron Black Cross]

"Cara, Do you know why im here? Its not because they found anything wrong with me mentally... It is because I have slain everyone who got in my way, Women, children, Animals, Cops, If they fucked with me they died... However... I don't kill innocents. If my gang knew this they wouldn't have me as their newly formed leader. The lawyer The state hired for me got me put in this place instead of prison. He thought it to be better then prison. Cara... I do still feel, I still have emotions. Though I hate it I even care for you. It doesn't matter though Because If your with me, Itll only weaken me. "

Syron looked at her with his cold eyes, peircing her own. He looked as calm and collected as ever. His eyes looked around the pure white room. His blond hair his only shield from the lights in the room.

"I do believe there is a god, Though I don't care if their is one or not, It effects me very little, and hell is my final resting place. I've seen the cults you see, praising lucifer and such... And The mircales they ask for are always granted. Fire from hell to burn their enemies alive. I've killed these types of people you see. Not because Im religious, But because They pose a threat to those who follow me."

Syron looked to cara and put his hand on the wall and pushed as hard as he could, Nothing happened. HE pulled his fist back and hit the wall hard his razors poped out of his glove and slit the wall open leaving a large scratch in the wall.

"I will escape this place... Cara take care of yourself after I leave."
Syron said coldly and hit the wall again leaving another scar in the wall but causing his fists to bleed even more.

"Nothing is without sacrifice. Blood must be paid for freedom."
He said darkly.